A lump in my throat and a steady stream of tears consumes me when I think about our exchanging of vows at our ceremony. Although past brides have attested to the swift feeling of everything during the ceremony, I am determined to soak in every minute as I’m speaking my promises out loud to Pieter, our friends and our family. As much as I’m looking forward to the lighthearted and jammin’ reception, I also want to be completely in the moment when I’m saying my vows. Now of course in order to get there though, you’ve got to have someone to marry you!
One of the first commitments we made when we got engaged was to have John Bookshaw marry Pieter and I. Mr. Bookshaw is a Grand Rapids based officiant who not only married Pieter’s sister, but also his parents, and thusly he had a special place planned into our wedding. It was an unfortunate occurrence that Mr. Bookshaw is not available for our wedding due to a prior commitment. I have to say that it was such devastating news, that we swept the issue around for quite a while until a couple weeks ago when we realized that we should really get this in motion if we want to have a ceremony.
We turned to our event liaison Michele for guidance on officiant selections. She sent us over a short list of people who they kept as officiants who have been known to do well with their weddings. We ended up choosing a gentleman on the list and setting up a meeting with him. Although there will always be somewhat a disconnect because we have no past relationship, we both felt very comfortable with his personality. We both into the conversation not knew a whole lot, though, so I’d like to make some suggestions on when you meet with your officiant.
- Determine what ‘kind’ of ceremony you want; do you want it very traditional or casual? - Will you be saying your own vows or stick with the normal, and if so, do you want to alter them? - Do you want to include a candle lighting, sand pouring or wine box ceremony in the ceremony? - Get to know your officiant - it's so much easier to discuss details when you've shared a story or laughed at something together. This puts you in a more personal position with your officiant.
I strongly suggest sitting down together and writing down questions to ask, as we felt a little unprepared for the kinds of questions we were being asked. Any silly little question you may have could make a huge difference.
image from jerryyoon